23 December 2009

I Save You Big Money!

Fashion, that being the realm distinct from general dress and clothing, retains today more than ever the illusionary glare of flippancy and excess. However for the most parts, one is able to understand high prices due to the high quality materials and craft invested in certain pieces. A pair of £500 Rick Owens boots or £1000 Chronicles of Never leather jacket, whilst not being an everyday purchase, are frequently bought after months of saving by select consumers.

With fashion prices as they are today, it takes something rather...special...to really stand out to me. As such when I saw oki-ni stocking a selection of certain pieces by a label named Florian, I was speechless.

This is the full range, of what are optimistically called 'Rope Necklaces'.

As you can clearly see, what they are selling is - a long piece of red rope...

...for the amazingly low price of £215. No seriously. For those of you across the pond that is around $340.

My only reaction was...

So, for those individuals out there of questionable states of mind, who actually see a fashion accessory for sale, here is dapper kid's alternative to the Florian Rope Necklace for way less money, so that you have more money to, as I assume from your spending habits and judgement, burn in front of homeless people this Christmas. Catchy title no?

A quick search on everyone's favourite search engine reveals the Marine Super Store who boast a red rope for the amazingly cheap price of 20p a meter. That is £0.2o. Or, to put it another way, you could purchase 1,075 meters of this rope instead of buying the Florian piece. Screw a necklace, you could fashion a whole closet of outfits with that much rope!

Of course the pedantic amongst you may point out that the Florian piece is a silk rope, thereby demanding a higher price. However a similar search for silk rope throws up a number of alternatives also. Primarily consisting of online stores catering to certain adult proclivities, red silk rope is actually surprisingly affordable.

A rather charmingly named Bound-to-Please offers 11 meters of silk rope for only £5.95.

Of course higher quality is always available. A certain Deviant Play offers 10 meters of quality red silk rope for, the still wallet friendly, £8.95.

Seriously though - Florian, you leave me utterly baffled and oddly angry.

Currently playing: Down ft. Lil Wayne - Jay Sean



  1. I saw them on the site...not crazy with the look/design...almost like a death sentence no!?

  2. There are so many things which make me angry when online shopping or reading stylish tips but the Florian necklace has to be one of the most odd I've seen. The fact that these are selling out just goes to show that we walk the land of idiots.

  3. Hey there. Thanks for stopping by and commenting on my Tuesday post on my Dino Lounge blog. Glad you enjoyed those Sammy ads. If you haven't checked it out yet, I've got my last Christmas post up now. I'll be taking a break until after the New Year rolls in. Take care. Season's Greetings to you and yours!

  4. Oy. How on earth did something so inane end up selling out?

  5. wow this is a thought provoking post

  6. For fashion accessories I’m a big fan of Etsy.com. The prices are reasonable and even if you spend a little extra you don’t feel buyers remorse on whatever you get because you know it was made by an artist that does one of a kind stuff.

  7. You're hilarious. :P
    I can't believe they are selling rope for that much. Rope! Ugh.
    But yes, your alternatives are FAR superior. And for that cheap, I bet it would be more motivating to get a little more creative. I'm thinking someone needs to do a DIY with rope ASAP!! (Not me though, I'm terrible at that stuff, lol).

  8. I hope that just the thought ,not going to make them up.....but looks art in town......


  9. i have a similar frustration concerning americal apparel's jersey "scarf". its a swatch, guys...

    aside, you would rock that rope.

    xo s!

  10. Hahaha oh my god what were they thinking? Is the rope made from unicorn hair that's been dyed red? Jeez.
    Oh, and you could totally make your own panoramic photos! Photoshop would be the way to go (stitching), a la Andreas Gursky. Although it's not half as fun, it is still doable.

  11. Completely mad. More money than sense is a phrase that comes to mind!

  12. That's totally crazy...I wonder how many people will buy it.

  13. That is strange! But it is good if someone gets you angry just take it off and wipe them with it! :P

    Merry Christmas my friend!

  14. You really are a great writer! And I love your alternative choices to those expensive rope necklaces!


  15. I'm about to escape the city and become internet-less for the next few days so thought I would stop by again and wish you a Merry Christmas!

  16. Gosh! Thank you for drawing this tooo my attention DK! I'm a bit perlexed and puzzled and slightly amused!! Thank you!!...and Merry Christmas/ happy holidays to you for tomorrow!!

  17. Haha I loved this post!

    Merry christmas Mister!

  18. Hahahaha, way to stick it to Florian, DK. The things people do these days..

    seasons greetings :)

  19. ROTFLMAO, that was a good one! :D
    I hope you had a great time during these last few days, I also wish you a happy new year!

  20. You should credit Ursula Vernon for the use of her "Biting Pear of Salamanca" as a LOL WUT: