31 May 2009

Part Two: Of Blogging and Negativity


I realise that I have not shared an outfit post in rather a while, so here is what I have been wearing today. Apologies for a somewhat mundane outfit, however not to worry, I have a few more summer appropriate and colourful outfits to come.

I am not usually one to pair a t-shirt with a cardigan, however I wanted to create a nice balance between the white and black, so chose something with a deeper cut than a simple v-neck sweater. With these I wore a pair of slim raw denim jeans, with the bottoms rolled back slightly for a more summery feel. Given the lovely warm weather, I also opted for my espadrilles, rather than any heavyweight footwear. As I went out for a short walk this morning, I wore my single breasted trench and flat cap, just to cover up slightly.

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What made you start up a blog?
Why did you start your blog?

I think that blogging is about personal expression and sharing thoughts. Once a blog loses these aspects, it is at risk of becoming merely another information based site. I suppose the simplest answer is that I started a blog in order to share my thoughts and ideas on fashion. I have a number of female friends with whom I am able to talk to with regards to women's fashion, however there has never really been anyone with whom I am able to do the same about menswear. As such I decided to create a blog in order to express that interest, in a way where I was free to indulge in what detail I found to be relevant.

I guess I wanted to create a space in which I could express myself, in particular, the part of myself that may not otherwise be expressed to the fullest. I did not want a space where I would only simply scratch the surface of a thought lightly, highlighting its nature, but being far from understanding its conception and existence. I wanted a platform through which I could truly plunge into those thoughts and ideas, describing in detail my fascination with a collection, or garment or indeed my own daily outfits.

My blog allows me the chance to fully realise my thoughts and consider my initial reactions in more detail, whilst also cataloguing that process. One of the wonderful things about blogging is in essence the idea itself. One slowly builds a collection of posts, in which are contained thoughts, ideas, inspirations and indeed experiences. The very evolution of a blog is an interesting concept, for one can truly chart the change in one's aesthetic tastes and ideas.

I always feel that blogging about a certain subject, allows one the freedom to truly explore that subject, whilst essentially keeping a thought diary as one progresses. Even the most impersonal blogs manage to reveal something about the writer, even if only by the content they choose to post. A blog is somewhat of a public diary, for one chooses what to share, however it still acts as an arena to share you.

Indeed I have always sought to share the things that excite and interest me. I try to only ever post about things, which I am personally interested and fascinated by. I do not like the idea of a blog where one criticises others, for indeed I do not believe that any of us are in a position to do so.

If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression.

How would you like your blog to be perceived by others?


I am not really sure how others perceive my blog, and in a way I would like to leave it up to the reader to feel about it how they wish. However that being said, I would naturally like those who visit to enjoy my blog. I would like them to be interested by what I have to say, but also to share what they think. I would like to think that my blog allows one to get an idea of who I am - that my blog is truly an expression of me.

What is it like being one of very few male fashion bloggers in a sea of female bloggers?

I try not think of fashion blogging as being divided between male and female bloggers to be honest, I am more interested in the content and personality of a blog. However there certainly are a far greater number of female bloggers in respects to fashion than male.

I suppose that as being one of the relatively few male fashion bloggers, there is an added impetus to maintain a higher quality blog. I do not mean that in terms of being better than the female-run blogs, or indeed other male-run fashion blogs, but rather in terms of trying to do my best. I think that regardless of which activity one applies oneself to, it should be done to best of one's abilities. I try to make sure that I run the best blog that I can.

I blog for the love of blogging. The moment that I feel that I am blogging for another reason, I think that I would have to reevaluate my decision. I try not to compare myself to other bloggers, otherwise one runs the risk of blogging for the wrong reasons.

What is your favourite blog?

My favourite blogs are those which I can read or view, and truly gain an understanding of the person behind it. They are not necessarily fashion blogs, for to confine oneself to a singular subject does not allow one to truly grow as a person.

What have you learned or gained from reading other peoples' fashion blogs?

In the initial stages of creating a blog, I think that reading other blogs allows one to understand the more casual nuances of maintaining a blog. Whilst there is no correct or incorrect way to blog, I found that finding my own way of blogging required not only developing a form that complimented me, but also seeing what worked for others. So reading other blogs initially helped me to form my own.

The main strength of blogging is the community experience behind it. One can connect with others who share the same interests, or indeed others with whom one shares no common ground. The immense diversity within the world that blogs, means that one is truly open to a wealth of ideas and interests. As such, I find that I enjoy other blogs for the same reason one enjoys the company of other people. I am able to read the blogs of people with whom I may share interests, yet their individual views open a new way of thinking about a topic, which I may have never otherwise thought about. Indeed other blogs will inevitably influence my own thoughts and tastes, and that is what I enjoy about the experience.

Does anyone of your friends or family know about your blog?
Have you told anyone about your blog?


In a word - no. I did not really announce the creation of my blog to anyone who I know, although some do now know about it. I do not really think that my family would be interested by my blog, although they may have seen it passing. With regards to my friends, I think the only real announcements I made, were either mentioning it in passing or placing a link to my blog on my Facebook page. I would like to think that those who are interested by what I write about, read my blog.

How do you deal with negative comments?

I do not use a security word box and allow anonymous commenting simply to allow those who may be interested to comment. I invite those who disagree with what I have to say to comment, provided it is polite and constructive. Indeed if we all shared the same views, the world would not be as exciting a place as it is. If somebody wishes to leave an abusive comment, I ignore it, and in the case of profanities, delete it.

I feel that life is too short to have anger in your life. I do not get angered by abusive comments, nor do I give them any real thought. I think that those people who choose to hide behind the anonymity of the internet to leave such comments, are cowardly. I feel that they are simply at a bad place within their lives.

They do not leave abusive comments because they dislike a person as such, but rather because it makes them feel better about themselves. They are at a point in their lives where they may feel alone or angry at themselves for not being where they would like to be, and so they lash out so that they may concentrate their anger somewhere. Far from getting angry at them, I hope that they can find happiness within their lives and smile once again.

Currently playing: Starstruck - Santogold

xxxx

72 comments:

  1. I wish more men would dress like you! I love your hat and jeans!
    Great post again!

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  2. wise and refreshing words once again, particularly concerning anonymous commenters.

    and i whole heartedly agree, blog should be a home for creativity and expression, not cesspools of criticism (which unfortunately many are), i never cease to be amazed by the overwhelming amount of beautiful things and insightful opinions i find on other people's blogs.

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  3. you are wise beyond many people's years. i totally agree with you on people that leave abusive/ disrespectful, or people like in general. it is more a reflection of what is going on in their lives.
    "If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression." Genius.

    Also there is nothing mundane about your ensemble! i love the shoes!

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  4. Once again, I love your answers! You always have interesting things to say, no matter what :D

    I love, love, love what you said about criticism! Very beautiful and very true. Although I may be guilty of posting of (maybe?) criticizing others, it really isn't the right thing to do. We should make our blogs a place to display our interests more than anything else.

    Hahahah I remember when I first started blogging. It was...interesting. I really didn't have any idea what I was doing and just posted about anything and everything (some things never change, eh?) :P
    I suppose after a while you read other blogs and see what they do, and form what you want your own page to be like. It keeps happening, even now, doesn't it? :)

    My bestfriend's mom, Dani, who also blogs, got my bestfriend, Katherine, and I to blog last summer. So, they obviously know. Katherine doesn't really blog anymore. She's not the writing type. My parents know and think it's kind of weird, but go with it since it's better than being on Myspace or Facebook all day :P
    Other than that, nobody else really knows.

    xo,
    hk

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  5. Oh how much I love your thoughts about blogging. Such a wonderful and creative way to see bloggy world. I am with you 200% and more :-)"If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression." (This part was my favourite). Keep up the good "work" and thanks for sharing your beautiful thoughts with us. Much love: Evi

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  6. I love your whole outfit! And I totally agree with all of your thoughts in this post - about blogging and criticism/negativity.

    I especially love these parts:
    "If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression."
    &
    "I feel that life is too short to have anger in your life."

    Thank you for a wonderful blog ^^

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  7. So am I! It's crazy what cool stuff some guys can do with graffiti!
    Oh, really like your shoes . hey!

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  8. Great outfit DK! ...& cheers on the last Q&A; certainly 100% agree!
    We all need to smile more anyway, & flex our facial muscles :)

    ~XO+SMILEs*

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  9. what a great taste for style, really my classmates could learn so much from you. Thank you for comment that's really sweet, and indeed I have loved the sun this weekend hopefully it's gonna shine tomorrow too. How was your weekend?

    xx

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  10. after reading these answers, i consider you an even more interesting person. i agree with you on many things, and no one i know knows about my blog, well except for pat.
    probably my favorite post so far.

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  11. i really love the simplicity of your outfit- and your answers to this batch of questions. none of my friends or family members (except for bonnie) know about my blog either! one of the reasons i love yours so much is because you do seem to be expressing yourself genuinely, which is quite a lovely thing to behold. keep up the good work (:

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  12. Those shoes look super comfortable. I love the quote you put about blogging that it should be filled "with the passions of our expression." Very true.

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  13. Wonderful answers, as always! And I do agree with you that it's nice to see/hear from the person behind the blog. That's why I'm stepping out from behind the shadows to do more personal essays and outfit posts on my own blog. The personal posts are always the ones that people seem to enjoy the most anyway. Love the rolled up hems on the jeans and your lovely glasses, BTW. Looking forward to more outfit pictures!

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  14. I love your outfit =) And I loveddd reading your answers because I so agree! I love posting collections and outfits but its generally inspired or provoked by something that's going through my head that day =) And yess Life's too short to be angry! You're a great person =)

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  15. I think you look great!
    And good reading on the interview as well:)

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  16. Hey DK...first of all, I love a cardigan with a tshirt! I think you look great, and the rolled up jeans are perfect.

    I hate to be unoriginal but-
    "If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression." WOW...that really struck a cord with me.

    I love how you really dive into each question and give such thoughtful answers.

    I hope Sunday is treating you well, doll.
    XOXO,
    Liz

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  17. MWAH, we know you a teeny bit better now :) and negative comments, they're all just jealous.

    xx-LJ from SOS!

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  18. Great reading your answers---it gives me a bit more insight into your life, thoughts, etc.

    I loved what you said about abusive comments---I think that you are really tolerant of people---that is such a good trait!

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  19. Great photos. I love what you are wearing. Wonderful post. It was quite a joy to read your answers to those questions. I'm a big fan of your blog. I'm always engaged by the insightful posts that you do. I hope you had a fantastic weekend. Cheers!

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  20. Haha, so this is you hiding in your room I see! I like your hat.

    I agree about your favorite blogs though.. I like knowing the person behind it!

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  21. I'm so glad you wrote you "blog for the love of blogging." I think with blogs getting more popular and people turning it into a business, this is a less and less popular standpoint. I like people with the only agenda of enjoying the actual process.
    P.S. Also digging the newsboy cap.

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  22. You look so great ! I love your pants and your shoes !

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  23. i very much enjoy this outfit post(:
    the hat adds a very nice touch.

    and i absolutely love reading your answers to these
    questions!
    your quote about blogging is marvelous(:



    *dani

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  24. I really like to read these interviews of yours!
    I like the cardigan!

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  25. i'm in love with your shoes..your glasses and your beret...great style boy...!

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  26. You are a legend. Just thought I'd let you know. I think it's great that your blog, whilst not telling men how to dress, provides such a great insight into men's fashion. Promise me you'll never stop blogging =.D

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  27. I'm loving these q&a's its revealing a lot more about u...u seem like a cool dude love ur sense of style too

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  28. Great q&a and I adore Ur jeans. Great colour! I have similar colour Levi's! :D

    XoXo

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  29. "If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression." this is so well said!

    Hat looks so good on you!

    xoxo

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  30. i think, only a small opinion,
    if you tie up your hair might be nice.
    i like the way how you talk.
    and your jacket.
    :-)

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  31. You look, well, very dapper ;) I especially love the layering you have going on in the first photo.

    As far as your response to negativity, can I just say you sound supremely mature- I'm using you as inspiration when we get anything negative our way.

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  32. I so love the hat. I think its the best season for a T-shirt and cardigan.

    Loved your answers.

    Have a great week

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  33. Another amazing post! Gosh, why can't guys be as stylish and mature as you? Seriously. Love your outfit.. you should do more! One of my favorite parts of having a blog, if not THE best part, is having a community who just 'gets it.' I don't experience this in my daily professional life, so to be able to use my blog as a creative outlet for one of my passions has been freeing. Keep it up because your one of the few places that I get to learn about men's fashion and style!

    xo, Becs

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  34. Great to get the scoop on why you started your blog. I'm glad you took some pics of your outfit, too.

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  35. This was a fantastic post. I so want your hat. I love hats. Hope you have a beautiful week.

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  36. You outfit is anything but mundane, DK! Love the hat and jeans!

    And your blog is so lovely... this post is heartfelt and well-written. Love what you say about the diversity of the blogosphere.

    Best quote:
    "If our blogs are the gardens of our minds, make them not ugly with the weeds of criticism, rather make them beautiful with the passions of our expression."

    xoxox,
    CC

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  37. I really enjoyed reading your reasons behind your blog. We can all relate and I find the evolution of blogs really fascinating too. My blog now is definitely different to how it was at the very beginning.

    Like the outfit and the decision to turn the jeans up for a more casual style.

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  38. im lovin your blog you got yourself one new followers . well technically two cuz there is two of us ;)
    We Were Damsels

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  39. I love that cardigan. <3

    I also love reading all of your answers :] It's really neat when you can learn more about the person behind the blog!

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  40. interesting answers again. i have not told family or friends about my blog, it is something i do for me & i find it provides a very different interest away from everything else.

    love love love the outfit, it's the cut on each piece & how they compliment each other that makes it work so well.

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  41. First off, I really like your take on a casual Summer outfit. I've never known a man to look bad in a flat cap either ;-)

    I really enjoyed reading the second part of the Q&A. Your take on negative commenting is very true, especially with regard to the nature of such commenters. All your answers are very insightful - I know a lot of people merely skim the surface of blogs or see them as superficial, so reading how you can better understand the person behind the blog you're reading is quite refreshing. I agree that sharing interests and views with other people in the blog world is one of the true advantages of maintaining a blog (besides having an outlet for your thoughts and your passion).

    By the way, let me know if you'd be interested in a link exchange. In any case, I've added you to my blogroll :)

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  42. I love how you take your outfit apart and describe it piece by piece, it's nice to know what goes through peoples minds when they're putting an outfit together.

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  43. I feel lucky to have discovered your blog because I enjoy your writing so much. I think my favorite answer is on negative comments.

    I kind of wonder what it's like to talk to you in person. Do you think you speak more formally than others?

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  44. Your responses to those questions were quite sincere and pleasant to read.I think that blogs can become really superficial at times, and yours is refreshing becomes it doesn't come off that way at all! Bravo, sir!

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  45. u look so cute!!!
    love love..

    hihihi
    *0*

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  46. I like your answer on how to deal with negative comments, exactly what i think as well. Your outfit is very adorable especially the hat.

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  47. It was nice reading your answers, you seem quite thoughtful..
    I also like your outfit, no matter how simple it is.

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  48. hey, cutie!! love your glasses more than you and your thoughts.. naaah, just kidding :p

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  49. firstly WOW, you have great style..and secondly I really do LOVE your blog..i just found it so i'm very happy..

    Lola. :)
    hope you can visit me sometime..

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  50. Ah, I love how you answer!

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  51. great sweater, you have nice style, very thoughtful answer--love the response on negative comment.
    xxoxo

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  52. love your look, especially that hat of yours!
    btw, are you a london-boy?

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  53. oops, hit the button to fast...

    love your look, especially that hat of yours! btw, are you a london-boy?

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  54. we DO know about your blog. xoxox

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  55. i loved this post.. and i adore coming by to check out your blog with your fabulous outfits.. wonderful writing.. and stunning photography!

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  56. I also loved this post as I love your blog.
    Those were great answers, and I can perceive the lovely person behind.
    Thank you for sharing all.

    xoxo

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  57. Great answers, sir! I really like the one about what you have gained from blogs. I agree completely about the great sense of community. It is such a great thing :)

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  58. hemmm you didnt answer my question :(

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  59. Hey!! I'm looking at study abroad programs in London, and I wanted to see what you thought about the schools and stuff (in regard to Art History). I've been looking at AIU, mainly because there's this class called Survey of British Museums, which sounds AWESOME! Anyway, do you know anything about AIU? Also, which museums do you like the best in your area?

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  60. screw the haters! they're a waste of space and ain't got no time for such nonsense.
    you look lovely by the way

    *bisous*

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  61. First, I absolutely love your outfit. You always manage to look so sharp, no matter what you wear. And even though I've said it countless times, I do wish there were more guys out there who took the time to dress well :)
    I love your responses to the Q&A. I like how sincere your answers are, and it just gives more insight into who you are and how you think.
    Love this, DK!

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  62. Hooray for outfit photos hihi. You look lovely dear :) xxx

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  63. Brilliant Interview. You are so savvy!

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  64. REally feelin' this interview. Very honest answers. Kudos to a high-quality blog.

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  65. Love your tone.
    Beautiful words on such an ugly topic, negative commenting gets me mad. x

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  66. It took me a long time to let my friends know about my blog. I'm quite shy about it!

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  67. Hi Dapper, great rig! YOu look fab, love the glasses, I have some like that. Keeping blogging we love it. CArla x

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  68. you write really eloquently...i think i need to come back and read your Q and A's properly to do them justice.

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  69. i am going through my google reader and i'm a bit behind.

    i love your answers and thank you for sharing this. i love your answers to this and especially about the negativity. i just got one today (seriously, i'm such an easy target) and when i do, i let the anxiety get to me. this was so unexpected and great to read!

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